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GROUPIES

November 18, 2022

Which nations will survive from group to knockout stage? Here are our odds to win.

Group A: Netherlands (-225), Senegal (+450), Ecuador (+550), Qatar (+1400)

Prediction: Look for the Dutch and Senegal to advance, with Ecuador as a darkhorse.

Group B: England (-275), USA (+450), Wales (+650), Iran (+1800)

Prediction: The U.S. will squeak by because they have lots of young talent while Wales has Gareth Bale and his cute manbun. Iran is old and teammates are literally arguing with one another about national unrest on Twitter.

Group C: Argentina (-275), Poland (+500), Mexico (+500), Saudi Arabia (+3300)

Prediction: Mexico are expected to go through, but look for Poland’s Robert “Lewangoalski” to singlehandedly carry Poland past the Mexicans (aka “El Tri”).

Group D: France (-215), Denmark (+220), Tunisia (+2000), Australia (+2000)

Prediction: Denmark is known as the happiest nation in the world and advancing will make them even more so.

Group E: Spain (-110), Germany (+115), Japan (+1000), Costa Rica (+5000)

Prediction: Spain is a great soccer nation, while Costa Rica has nice wellness retreats and Japan top-shelf sushi.

Group F: Belgium (-145), Croatia (+210), Morocco (+800), Canada (+1200)

Prediction: Croatia should get through on talent alone, but it’s a joy to watch Canada’s Alphonso Davies, already one of the world’s best fullbacks at 22.

Group G: Brazil (-290), Switzerland (+550), Serbia (+550), Cameroon (+2000)

Prediction: Switzerland and Serbia will clash for the final spot, with Serbs making the Swiss miss.

Group H: Portugal (-140), Uruguay (+175), Ghana (+1200), South Korea (+1200)

Prediction: Uruguay, without a doubt. Ghana is the tourney’s youngest team, and this is not one of South Korea’s better squads.